


Kerosene.

by annaiva_v



Series: Welcome home [1]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King, Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Stranger Things Fusion, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, F/M, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Minor Injuries, Murder, Rape/Non-con Elements, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:41:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 11,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25986802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annaiva_v/pseuds/annaiva_v
Summary: I fill my eyes with keroseneLet it all burn, let it all burnThe whole of Russia is watching meLet it all burn, let it all burn
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier, Eleven | Jane Hopper/Mike Wheeler, Patrick Hockstetter/Richie Tozier
Series: Welcome home [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1944757
Comments: 24
Kudos: 38





	1. Take my heart when you go

I open my eyes and the fluorescents above glare at me. My head is full of cotton as

I try to move around, I lift my arms and realize they are attached to wires.

“Richard, you’re awake.” The use of my full name sets my teeth on edge, only my dad called me that.

“Do you know where you are? Do you know what day it is?” I can’t make out the person standing in front of me, where are my glasses?

“No. Where are my glasses?” She ignores my question and writes stuff down.

“You are in the Derry hospital, it’s November 16th.” She still hasn’t told me where my glasses are. How am I supposed to concentrate on answering questions when there’s a migraine crawling up my neck.

“What is the last thing you remember?” 

“November 15th, where are my glasses?” She writes a few more things down before exiting the room, what the fuck is going on?

“Hello Richard, my name is Dr. Andrew Johnson. I’ve been treating your injuries since late last night. You have three fractured fingers, a broken rib, a broken nose, and a minor concussion. You are scheduled to be released tomorrow, do you have any questions?” As he lists off my injuries I start to feel the dull ache off each of them, no doubt the morphine keeping them at bay.

“Where are my glasses?”

“I’m afraid you can’t have them back, They’re damaged beyond repair” you gotta be fucking kidding me.

“Where are my friends?” He writes something down and clicks his tongue.

“Visiting hours are in twenty minutes, I’m sure they’ll show up.” He says it with a scowl and closes the door with a snap of his wrist. I resign myself to sit in silence, I don’t even wanna try to find the remote for the TV.

The twenty minutes go by achingly slow and I’ve already started to doze off again before a knock at the door shakes me out of it. It slowly opens and I expect to see at least one of my friends, but an unfamiliar woman walks in.

“Hello, Richard. My name is Barbara Smith and I’m a child social worker. I’ve been assigned to your case. I have a few questions for you, so if you’ll please answer to the best of your ability.” This is the last fucking thing I need right now. A fucking child social worker.

“How did you sustain these injuries?”

“I don’t know.” She clicks her tongue and writes something down.

“When was the last time you saw your mother?”

“I don’t know.” She writes down more things.

“Has your father ever been violent with you?” He loved me and had never once raised his hand against me.

“No.” She writes more things down then snaps her notebook shut. 

“I will be working closely with you in the following days, so I’d like to get to know you better.”

“Let’s start by telling me your favorite subject in school. Are you good friends with anyone?” It’s like the first day of grade one all over again, does she think I’m a child? But I don’t have the energy to mess around with her, so I decide to play along.

“Biology, I have a few close friends.” I decide to not tell her their names just yet.

“Do you visit them often, or are they just school friends?” I narrow my eyes at her.

“We see each other every day.” I wish I could clearly see her expression, it frustrates me that I can’t read her.

“Let’s get right to it, we will be relocating you to Hawkins, Indiana with your aunt and uncle. You will be staying with them until we figure out a permanent place for you.” Relocation to Indiana. They’re taking me away from my friends, my family.

“Why am I moving?” I decide to play the dumb card. They can’t just take me away, with no proof of anything.

“You are in this hospital bed because we suspect that your father did this to you. Your parent's whereabouts are unknown at the moment so for your own safety, we have decided you should live with your aunt and uncle. I know this may be hard on you but it’s for your own good.” They can’t do that! They have no fucking proof! what the fuck is going on? I can’t leave, I can’t leave my friends, my life. My mother’s been estranged from her sister for years, I’ve probably only met her once when I was five. I don’t want to leave, I can’t leave.

“But that’s not true, he’s never hurt me.” She tuts and flips through her notebook.

“We have several accounts from residents who strongly suggested that something wasn’t right with your father.” You’ve got to be fucking kidding me, the one-time theses stupid adults notice something is up, they come to the wrong conclusion. Un-fucking-believable. 

“When you’re discharged tomorrow you’ll be allowed to return home to get your belongings. We leave on the 18th, you’ll have one last night with your friends. I realize that this can be a very difficult situation for you, so please, don’t hesitate to reach out.” It’s the spiel they give to every fucked up kid they’re paired with. She probably only cares when she gets her pay-check. She leaves shortly after she hands me some forms, that I can’t even fucking read. There’s another knock and whoever it is doesn’t wait for a response. Eddie and Beverly burst through the door and almost trip over themselves trying to get to me. I want to ask where the others are but I decide that I can wait until they calm down.

“Oh my god Richie, I was so fucking scared. They wouldn’t let us in right away, who was that lady? Are they treating you alright? Do you need anything?” Eddie bombards me with questions and doesn’t leave any room for my answers. Beverly just looks on with sad eyes, I always had an inkling that she knows more than she lets on.

“They’re taking you away, aren’t they?” Eddie looks at me with disbelief, I hate to break his heart.

“That’s not true, they can’t take you away!” My lack of response seems to be enough for Beverly and she leaves the room. 

“I’m going to Indiana to live with my relatives. I have two days left here.” I can’t see his face but I can hear his quiet sniffles. I reach out in hope to wipe away his tears. He leans into my touch and rests there for a few seconds. I feel sick to my stomach.

“How long? Isn’t there any other way, they can’t take you away from me.” 

“We don’t have a choice, Eds. They’re the adults, were not. It’s only one year until your eighteen, you can come to get me and we’ll run away together.” I give him a sad smile, I can’t see his expression. There’s another knock and Eddie jumps back from me, the doctor walks back into the room.

“I’m sorry to cut this short but Richard needs his rest. He will be released tomorrow, you can see him then.” My friends are ushered out and I’m left alone again. 

I can’t sleep, they’ve been weaning me off the morphine and the pain is a constant thrum beneath my skin. I refuse to call for the nurse if I do I risk the chance of them keeping me here. Or maybe that would be good, the social worker can’t force them to let me out if I’m not fully healed. I know it’s no use though they’re going to take me away and I have absolutely no say in it.

“Alright Richard, I’ve given you some pain medication the instructions are on the bottle. I advise you to follow the instructions very closely. You will be allowed to return to your house to gather your belongings, one of your _friends_ has volunteered to accompany you.” He says the word friends with such animosity, it makes me think he’s never had any. He hands me the prescription forms and unhooks me from all the machines, it’s a relief to no longer hear my heartbeat.

“You’re good to go, Richard, Barbara will be at your house at 11:30am tomorrow.” After that, he exits the room and I’m left to change into the fresh clothes Eddie brought me. It’s a plain yellow hoodie and black ripped jeans, it is Eddie’s favorite outfit of mine. I quickly exit the hospital and walk the short distance to my apartment complex. Eddie is sitting on the fire escape with a pack of Marlboro gripped in his hand. His face lights up when he sees me and he jumps up.

“I got these for you.” He hands me the pack and I shoot him a grateful smile. He lets me in front of him to unlock the door, as soon as we’re inside he pushes me against the wall. His greedy lips leave a trail of fire up my neck, I groan and let my head hit the wall behind me. If only he knew what had really happened, would he still be doing this?

“Eager, are we?” he gives a noncommittal grunt and finally presses his lips to mine, it’s hot and wet. I quickly reverse our positions and drop to my knees infant of him, which is a huge mistake. Without my glasses, I miscalculate the distance to the floor, and both my knees slam into the hardwood, which in turn jostles my freshly fractured ribs. I let out a choked whimper that Eddie mistakes for arousal, he grips my hair and tugs on it, hard. 

“Eddie, stop please.” He releases me and drops down to his knees so he’s eye level.

“Shit, are you ok? Did I hurt you?” 

“It’s fine, it’s just my injuries.” He rushes out of my eye-line and I sit there on the floor unable to see anything. He comes back a few seconds later and places my back up glasses on my nose. He tries to do it gently but it still really fucking hurts.

“Do you remember, what happened?” Every fucking second of it.

“No.” I lie ashamed of myself.

“The doctors said your neighbor brought you in when they found you passed out on the street.” Shit, what had she seen? I can’t have any witnesses who knows what this town will do to me. There’s a slight twinge in my nose that makes me wince.

“How about you take your meds and I’ll start packing your things?” I nod my head and he gets to work, easily navigating through my stuff. I take my pills and get up to help Eddie.

“I really wanted our last time together to be special.”

“This isn’t the last time, Eds. Whatever’s going on is temporary. We,” I gesture between us.

“Are forever.” He kisses me gently and it really feels like the last.

“I have a surprise, but you won’t know until we get to the clubhouse.” He’s got a mischievous smile on his face.

“Are we finally gonna fuck in the hammock?” 

“Ew no! Do you even know how unsanitary that is? And with all your injuries it would be irresponsible of me.” I roll my eyes and even the simple motion hurts. I finish packing up my duffle and set it by the front door. We walk slowly towards the clubhouse and my anticipation builds in every step. We locate the hatch and Eddie throws it open, he walks down with me and makes sure I don’t trip on anything.

“Surprise!” All the losers shout in unison. It really hurts my head but I push past the pain, just grateful that all my friends are here.

“We heard that you’re leaving, so we all decided to give you a gift.” Beverly hands me a box wrapped in old newspapers, and I take it gratefully. I quickly unwrap it and gasp when I see what is inside.

“Oh my god.” It’s filled to the brim with polaroid photos of all of us. Many of them are candid shots of me and Eddie bickering or Bev and I sharing a smoke. There are some of us all sitting together at the quarry, or sharing a milkshake at the burger joint. 

“It’s so you don’t forget us.” I feel a few tears roll down and I quickly wipe them away. I take turns hugging each of them. Lingering in Eddie’s embrace, probably for the last time.

“Turning away from the sadness, this is not your only surprise.” Bev pulls out a baggie filled with weed, and Bill pulls out our group bong.

“Where did you get this?” 

“I have my ways.” She winks at me, and I refuse to think of the implications. She fills the bowl and lights it. They let me start and I take a deep inhale. We pass it around a few times until all of us are pleasantly buzzed. Luckily they thought ahead and the rough dirt floor is covered in sleeping bags and pillows.

“I love you guys so much.” I make eye contact with Eddie as I say it. They all repeat it back and I drift off with Eddie’s lithe arms around me.

Bev and I are sitting on rocks facing the Barrens, it’s 10:58am.

“Why aren’t you freaking out?” I suck hard on my cigarette and let the smoke linger in my mouth before blowing it out.

“The painkillers have my head all fuzzy.” I bark out a quick laugh. She stays silent.

“I’m serious Richie, they’re taking you away.” I crush the cigarette under the heel of my sneakers and turn to look at her.

“Of course I’m fucking freaking out, Bev. They're taking me away from you guys, from Eddie. I’m going to fuckass Indiana to live with an Aunt I barely even remember.” She puts her arm around me and pulls me in for an awkward side hug, it’s nice.

“We’re almost adults, we’ll be back together before you even know it.”

“I hope you’re right, Bev.” She smiles

“I usually am.”

  
When I’m sitting in the passenger seat of the social workers' car, it really hits me. I’m fucking moving because this piece of shit social worker can’t do her damn job. I lay my head against the window and revel in the pain it gives me.

“Are you excited, Richard?” Is she really trying to make small talk with me, like she isn’t ruining my fucking life?

“No.” I turn my whole body away from her and close my eyes, hoping she gets the message. She does and she’s silent for the rest of the drive, only speaking to let me know we’re here. She grabs my bags from the back and sets them in my open arms.

“Good luck.” Her smile is obviously forced, and so is mine. It drops off my face as soon as I’ve turned away from her. I find the sign indicating the Indiana bus and I pay for my ticket. As soon as I’m seated I pull out a crumpled polaroid of me and Eddie laying in bed together. We looked so happy, so unaware of what was about to happen. The edges crinkle around my fingers and I place it back in my pocket before I can ruin it any more. I close my eyes and let my thoughts drift away into darkness.

I’m jerked awake by a hand on my shoulders and a gruff voice.

“We’re in Indiana, it’s time to get off.” I quickly gather my things and walk briskly off the bus, to not further agitate the man. I quickly spot a sign with my name on it, being held up by a woman with blond hair and a face like my mother’s.

“Hello, Richard! I’m your Auntie Karen, it’s so nice to see you again.” She has a grin plastered on her face.

“Likewise,” I mutter back. Her smile falls a bit but she still leads me to her car with an uppity attitude. The drive to her house is silent, save for her pointing out some landscapes and national landmarks. Not soon enough we arrive at the wheelers' house. It’s a modest little place with two levels and a manicured lawn.

“Welcome to your new home, Richard.” She opens the car door for me and I gingerly step out, so as not to aggravate my injuries. She leads me to the root door and I wait awkwardly as the key jams in the lock. She wiggles it a few times and it finally opens.

“Ted, Mike, Nancy! We’re home!’ There are four sets of footsteps approaching us as she leads me into the kitchen.

“Good evening, Richard. It’s nice to see you again.” I nod and smile, not really feeling up for a conversation. I look around the room and try to familiarize myself with my new ‘family’. My eyes land on a boy who looks freakishly like me, but younger. His hair is straight and he’s got an ugly scowl on his face. A thin girl stands next to him with a young child balanced on her hip.

“This is Mike, Nancy, Holly, and Ted.” She points to each one of them while saying their names. Each of them smiles at me, except Mike.

“Mike, will you help carry Richard’s things to his new room.” He begins to protest but Karen silences it with a scalding look. He begrudgingly picks up my bags and lugs them upstairs, while Nancy watches with distaste.

“I’m sorry about him, he’s upset because he had to give up his room.” Nancy seems nice, Mike not so much. Instead of answering her, I follow Mike upstairs, wincing at each step. Once we get to my new room he throughs my bags to the ground and turns to me with his hands on his hips.

“Why the hell are you even here? Don’t you have parents you can live with?” I’ve asked myself that at least a hundred times on the trip, but I don’t appreciate this fucking wannabe asking.

“Didn’t you hear? The social workers think my home is an unsafe environment.” His mouth gapes open a few times, just like a fish. I was past him and start closing the door.

“Don’t you have better things to do than standing there like a fish.” He splutters a bit more then turns away with a flushed face. I chuckle to myself and close the door, letting the silence settle in. I sit down on the star wars sheets and pull out my box of polaroids. I rummage through mike drawer until a find a small container of pins. I pin them on the wall in no particular order, once I’m satisfied a sit back down and pull out the more intimate photos of Eddie and I. I smile to myself and tuck them under the mattress, for safekeeping.


	2. A discovery of something

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I am not Russian or fluent in Russian so I apologize in advance if any of the translation or spelling is wrong. Seetting that aside I hope y'all enjoy the new chapter!

I momentarily panic when I wake up in an unfamiliar room, then remember the events of the past two days. I get out of bed and try and find my way to the shower, to wash the past days' nastiness from me. It seems that no one else is up when I finally finish in the shower, so I take a risk and light a cigarette on the back porch. Everything’s peaceful until I hear the porch door slide open.

“Richard Tozier, put out that cigarette right this instance.” I roll my eyes but do as she says.

“If I see you doing it again there will be serious consequences.” Jesus, Maggie didn’t even have that much of a problem with it. I get up and pass by her, she’s got a disappointed look in her eyes.

“Can I use the phone?” She places her hand on her hip and looks out to the porch.

“No.” I let out a big sigh and curse.

“Fucking Christ.” She grabs my arm before I can walk away.

“Look, I know you just got here and this is a big adjustment, but you can’t act or talk like that. I have a young daughter and a very impressionable boy and I will not tolerate this attitude.” She lets go and I rub at the spot where her nails left marks, she smoothes out her dress.

“I’m going out.” Before she can try to stop me I’m out the door and running down the street. I only slow down when I approach a convenience store, I head straight for the payphone. I take fifty cents out of my pocket and slide it into the slot. It rings a few times before someone picks up.

“Hello, Edward Kaspbrak speaking.” I smile at the sound of his voice.

“I’m calling about your recent order of dick pills.” He tells me to shut up and we break into a fit of laughter.

“I’m so happy to hear from you, I didn’t think you were going to call. Mike was saying some weird stuff about- You know what, forget it I’m just glad you called.” I don’t ask about Mike, I only have a limited amount of time on this call.

“Karen’s a bitch, and Mike’s a little shit. I really miss you.” I hear a sigh from his end and some indistinguishable voice, probably his mom.

“It fucking sucks not having you here, everything is so boring.” It’s good to know my jokes did something, I smile.

“I love you, and I’ll be back soon. I promise.”

“I.” The phone cuts off and the dial tone drones in my ear. I place it back on the hook and step out of the box, almost running into some kid. He apologizes and runs to catch up with his group, I see Mike is at the front.

“He’s such a pain, he even took my room, like what the hell? And he’s an asshole too, he said I looked like a fish!” I chuckle at the last part and begin to walk away.

“Why the hell is he even here anyway, mom wouldn’t tell me. But I’m pretty sure he’s a screwup and his parents didn’t want him anymore.” There is some protest from the group but I don’t care as I approach him. I grab him by the scruff of the shirt and haul him up against the wall.

“The fuck did you just say about me?” There’s a noticeable fear in his eyes and it makes me smile, damn right this kid should be afraid of me. I killed a fucking sewer clown, what’s he done?

“Stop it!” There’s a tug against my jacket and I let Mike go, he stumbles a bit and rights his sweater. I turn to see the kid I bumped into just a few moments ago.

“I’m Will, and I’m sorry about Mike.” There’s an indignant Hey from behind me, I ignore it.

“It’s whatever. I’m Richie, pleased to make your acquaintance.” I slightly bow down and give him a charming smile, he smiles shyly back.

“We’ve gotta get to the arcade, can we just go now?” Mike physically drags Will away and he gives me a sad wave and smiles. I walk down the street and look around at my new surroundings, it’s eerily similar to Derry. Buildings turn into trees and pavement turns into dirt.

 _“Richie!”_ A voice calls my name and I find myself following it deeper into the woods. The trees begin to blot out the sun and I find myself deep in the darkness. I light my lighter and use it to guide me to where I need to be, I come upon an old building, most of its windows cracked or broken. I step through the broken glass of the front doors and gasp when the flame illuminates the massacre inside.

 _“Help me!”_ I run to where the voice is coming from and see a man lying on the ground with a massive hole in his thoracic cavity. By any physical means, this man should not be alive, or even able to talk right now.

 _“What seems to be the problem?”_ I fall back on my usual method of deflection.

 _“The monsters, we let them out.”_ Monsters? Hell no, I will not be dragged into another suicide mission by some fucking rando with a massive hole in his chest!

“Hey, boy! You can’t be in here, this is restricted.” I turn around and see a burly man holding a flashlight right in my face.

“But this man he needs help.” I trail off and notice that the man I was talking to is fully decomposed, maggots squirm around his face.

“What man?” He shines the flashlight around frantically searching for a man that isn’t here.

“Nobody, I must have imagined it.”

The boy doesn’t respond or even look back when I shout at him to stay away from the woods. Teens these days are so damn disrespectful. I switch off my radio and follow the kid, which seems to be heading straight for the lab. He starts to pick up his pace and I curse as I start to jog after him He enters the building and stops in the center of all the body’s, I pull out a cloth and hold it over my nose, I don’t know how the kid can stand the stench.

“В чем проблема?” Russian? He’s a Russian, unbelievable. And he’s talking to dead bodies. You know, sometimes I really hate this town.

“Hey boy! You can’t be in here, this is restricted.” I shine the light directly in his face and he blinks up at me through his glasses. They seem to sit crooked on his face.

“But this man needs help.” He points to an empty spot where there is definitely not a man standing there.

“What man?” I shine the light around, in case he ran somewhere, but the kid looks just as confused as I am.

“Nobody, I must have imagined it.” He gets up and He follows me out of the building, I keep a close eye on him in case he tries to pull anything funny.


	3. Of monsters and men

I spoke to a man with a gaping hole in his chest, I absolutely positive. If killer alien clowns from space exist, I think it’s probable that people with lethal injuries can still speak. But the cop man didn’t see anyone.

“Where you from, boy?” I roll my eyes.

“Derry, Maine.” He doesn’t believe me, I can see it in his eyes and the way his shoulders tense. I don’t even know why I’m here, it’s not like I did anything wrong. Well I mean I did technically trespass but that place looks like it hasn’t been used in years if the dead bodies are any indication.

“You’re a long way from home. What’re you doing in Hawkins?” Yeah, I am a long way from home. I shrug, I don’t really feel like explaining my whole situation to a fucking cop.

“Living.” His hands clench on the steering wheel and I feel a small smile slip onto my face.

“Don’t get smart with me, I’ve had a long day.” 

“Can you drop me off at the corner store?” He begrudgingly agrees and pulls over, telling me he’s going to be keeping an eye on me. He’s probably worried I’m going to be a big mouth and tell all the town folk about all those body’s in the abandoned building. But I just got here and I’m not willing to make that solid of a first impression. I don’t fancy being teased for supposedly seeing and talking to dead people. Once he’s back on the main road and out of sight I enter the corner store. Kitschy music plays from the speakers and the stench of plastic fills the air. I look around for a bit and keep an eye on the clerk. Once she’s busied herself behind the counter I slip a few packs of Marlboro’s in my jacket. I also take a Mars bar, just because I’m feeling lucky. The clerk tells me to have a nice day and I wave politely as I leave. Once I’m out of range of the windows I peel open the chocolate and take a bite. The sweet chocolate goodness fills my mouth and I let out an appreciative hum, food always tastes better when you didn’t pay for it.

As soon as I open the front door I’m being berated.

“That was the last straw! You cannot parade around this house like it’s your own, I don’t care how Maggie and Wentworth let you act. You are in my home now, and you will do as I say. And you don’t get any phone privileges for the whole week, and you have to drive Mike around to where ever he wants to go.” I should never have gotten into Barbara’s car, I could have resisted, I have a whistle. This is so much worse than I thought it would be.

“I don’t want this to e hard on either of us, I’m not trying to make you miserable. But you have to follow the rules, ok?” I nod and she finally lets up, letting my pass to go up the stairs. Once I close the door behind me I pull out the pictures from under the mattress. I trace Eddie’s smiling face with my finger, I never knew I could miss someone this much. And I can’t even call him to tell him about all the weird shit I just say today. I sigh and lay back on the bed, the springs creaking beneath me. 

“Richard, can you drive Mike and his friends to the arcade?” I don’t know why she’s asking, it’s not like I can say no.

‘Of course, Karen.” She tells me where the keys are and I open the basement door.

“I’m driving you to the arcade, and if you’re not up in twenty seconds I’m leaving without you.” Karen gives me a look but doesn’t comment. Mike runs up in an astonishing ten seconds and gives me a nasty look.

“I know mom’s making you drive me, so you can’t just leave without me.” I’m already pissed off at him, I’m not sure I can stand to be in the same confined space with him for an undefined amount of time. Once we're both buckled in the car I ask him to direct me to his friend's houses.

“Why do I have to direct you?” I roll my eyes.

“Have you forgotten that this is my first time ever being here?” He huffs but directs me nonetheless, which I’m grateful for. His friends live relatively close and I’ positive they all could’ve biked to the arcade, but I’m sure Mike knew that as well. I can see the mischievous glint in his eyes.

“Hey! You’re the kid that yelled at Mike the other day.” The curly-haired kid yells from the back seat, I smile at him in the rearview mirror. Once all his friends are in I drive down to the Starcourt mall, Hawkins's new hotshot mall. Derry was always too small a town to have a mall, and also the murderous vibe it gave off. A bunch of missing children’s cases is surprisingly deterring to tourists. 

“Alright get out, we’re here.” I put the car in park and unlock the doors, they all hurry out and thank me for the ride. They all run into the arcade except one, Will if I’m remembering correctly.

“You aren’t coming in?” After Connor called me a fairy in front of all the Derry youth, no fucking way. Instead of explaining the fear of being outed and hate crimed, I just shake my head no. He surprisingly doesn’t follow after his friends and stays back with me. I pull out a pack and put a cigarette between my lips, I tip it in his direction but he shakes his head no. I light it and puff out the smoke in silence.

“Why are you here?” Usually, that question has a little bit of hostility behind it, but coming from him it only sounds like a genuine question.

“I got beat to hell and everyone thinks my dad did it, and my parents are MIA so they didn’t really know what to do with me. And since I’m not eighteen I had to go live with relatives.” I don’t really care that that’s definitely oversharing to a person I just met.

“Did he do it?” I don’t even have to think.

“No.” It seems like the end of the conversation and we both relate in the ensuing silence. Ten minutes go by and Will finally breaks the silence.

“What happened then? And where are your parents?” all perfectly valid questions, which I have no fucking clue how to answer.

“I’m not sure, I hit my head really hard.” It’s not exactly a lie, but still not the full truth. No one ever needs to hear it, lest there be grave consequences. I slide down the wall of the arcade and tuck my feet underneath me, Will does the same.

“Do you come here often?” That sounds like the worst pick up line ever, I internally cringe at myself.

“Yeah, Mike really likes it.” Sounds like he’s only doing it because of Mike. But hey, I can’t talk about it. I hunted down and killed a clown because big Bill wanted me to. The arcade door opens and Mike’s head comes into view.

“aren’t you coming in, Will? I need help beating Max at Dig Dug.” I gesture at him to go, and he does, smiling at Mike the whole time. I put out my cigarette and lift myself off the ground, that rundown building isn’t too far from here. I’ve probably got enough time to take a peek at it before Mike and his friends are done. I take the exact same path as before but make sure to check for any cop cars this time. The building is the exact same ominous structure as it was last time, but more visible in the daylight. Vines are crawling up the sides of the building and strange insects boxing around. I enter through the same broken door and see the same bodies. But this time there’s a different man, there’s a chance missing from the left side of his skull.

 _“Are you dead?_ ” He nods. So apparently I _can_ talk to dead people. Surprisingly that’s not as shocking as it should be.

 _“How did you die?”_ Is that insensitive? Probably.

“ _The monster killed us. We shouldn’t have let them out. They turned on their masters.”_ More monster, awesome.

 _“Are they still alive? Are they still out there?”_ The man walks away and another takes his place. His insides are now his outsides, and he has no eyes.

“They are waiting to strike. They build their power, then they feast.” I should just leave, get the hell out of this town and away from monsters. But I can’t, these people are in danger, and I’d basically be sentencing them to death.

 _“How do I stop it? How do I kill them? Why were you messing with monsters in the first place, do you know how colossally stupid that is. I don’t care if I sound awful right now, but I think you got exactly what you deserved.”_ The man has disappeared and a headache has started to build up in the back of my skull. I should probably tell someone about this, right? But I don’t want to be labelled the town crazy. If I could only get access to a phone, I could call Mike. He might have some type of insight on this. I run my hands through my hair and turn around, catching a glimpse of something running.

“What the hell?” I go out to investigate but I don’t see anything. I shrug and make my way back to the arcade.

“I don’t trust him, Will. I mean he shows up out of nowhere to come live with us, looking like he just got into a fight. Then he just runs off as soon as you leave? There’s something up with him.” I huff out a sigh, it’s always like this with Mike. As soon as someone new shows up he thinks they’ve done something bad. But I don’t think Richie is all that bad, he actually seemed really nice.

“I like him, and not everyone is out to get you. It’s not like what happened with eleven.” I shudder just thinking about it, I wasn’t actually there but it sounded terrifying.

“Trust me on this, Will. There’s something weird about him, so we should see where he’s going.” I already know I can’t talk him out of it, so I agree. The rest of the party seems on board too, they probably had enough of the arcade anyways. We walk a reasonable distance away from him, not to close, but close enough to see where he turns. After A while it’s very clear on where he’s going, the lab. And it even looks like he knows exactly what he’s doing and where he’s going. But there must be a reason, he seemed really genuine. We follow closely behind him as he steps over the broken glass, the stench of rot makes my eyes water. He doesn’t even seem phased by it, which I can admit is a bit strange. His back is to use and he seems to be talking to someone, but no one is there.

"Ты мертв?” That’s not English, Mike looks at me with shock clear on his face.

“Они еще живы? они все еще там?” That actually kinda sounds like Russian. Mike mouths the word Russian to me and I nod. I look around to the others and they seemed equally as shocked.

“Как мне это остановить? Как мне их убить? Зачем вы вообще возились с монстрами, знаете ли, насколько это колоссально глупо. Меня не волнует, звучит ли я сейчас ужасно, но я думаю, вы получили именно то, что заслужили.” He stops talking and begins to turn around. Mike mouths arcade and i turn to the others and do the same thing. We all run as fast as we can and pray that Richie doesn’t see us.


	4. bloody and raw, but I swear it is sweet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um so I wrote this in like an hour and I'm not really sure if it works.

The car ride home is concernedly silent, like hear a pin drop silent. Everyone keeps taking suspicious glances at me, they think they’re being subtle.

“Can you drop us off here?” Mike speaks up and I waste no time pulling over, the tension was stifling. They all get out and Will is the only one to thank me for driving. I pull into the driveway and put the car in park, and just sit in the silence for a few moments. Today has been a lot, and I really wish I could call someone. I finally get out of the car and walk inside the house where Karen is waiting for me.

“I know you just got back, but Mike called and said they needed to be picked up.” I literally dropped them off five minutes ago, but it’s not like a have a choice.

“Where is he?” I hope it’s not too far away, I need some time to have a mental breakdown before dinner. She gives me the address which sounds like it’s in the rural part of town, why the hell would they be there? Sighing I grab the keys again and drive out there.

The road has turned into gravel and the car is rattling dangerously, but I know I’m close to the house. The trees are getting thicker and their branches stoop down and scrap against the roof, sighing I put the car into park and walk the rest of the way. The house looks more like a rundown cabin that hasn’t been used in years, but this is the address Mike gave so I knock on the front door. The red-haired girl from earlier answers the door and tells me to come in while Mike grabs his stuff. The place is actually pretty nice inside, though everything looks extremely old. I step into the living room and I hear heavy footsteps behind me. Before I can even turn around something cold and metal clips around my wrist, it’s a goddamn handcuff.

“What the hell?” The other end is clipped around a hook protruding from the wall

“I’m sorry, I told them not to.” Will steps to from a room with shiny eyes, probably from unshed tears. The cop from before steps out from behind me and fixes me with a gruff look. This probably isn’t about the shoplifting. Fuck, Mike must’ve seen me talking to the dead bodies, I knew someone was there.

“You’re going to answer some questions.” Can’t a plead the fifth or something? This should be against the rules, I’m not even in a police station this is just some house with kids and a cop.

“This is kidnapping! I’m still a minor, I have rights!” Is this like a rogue cop situation? Have I committed a capital offence and now he’s going to kill me.

“I just have a few questions, then you can go home.”

“Alright.” Eddie’s going to have a field day when he hears about this. Hell, he might even drive down here to come to rescue me.

“Why are you here?” Once again I don’t feel like delving into my personal problems with an audience.

“Visiting family, isn’t that right Mikey?” I look over the cops' shoulder to smile at Mike, he glares back.

“You know this kid?”

“He’s my cousin.” Wow, I know where I’m not wanted. He didn’t even tell people I was his cousin.

“You had us handcuff and borderline kidnap your cousin?” Finally, someone is seeing some sense in this fucking funhouse. Thank you red-haired girl I don’t know.

“But he’s super suspicious! You saw him at the lab, he was talking to someone!” Shit, they say me. They’re going to think I’m crazy, I’m going to be committed.

“Who were you talking to.” Well here goes nothing.

“A dead guy.” They all look at me in shock, which was definitely expected.

“Was he talking back?” That’s what they’re asking? If he was talking back? Not, what items would you like to bring with you to the psych ward?

“Yeah?” At least I don’t think he was just a figment of my imagination.

“We all heard you speaking Russian. Are you plotting against America?” That is the stupidest fucking question ever. How could a teenager like me possibly bring down one of the strongest countries in the world?

“My mom’s Russian.” I shrug, there’s not much of an explanation there.

“It’s not my fault all the dead people are Russian.” I guess that is a bit strange, for an American lab to be full of dead Russians.

“That doesn’t make sense, my mom’s American.” Did Mike really not know. Both of them changed their names to sound more American but I didn’t realize Karen completely erased that part of herself.

“Obviously not.” Mike tries taking a run at me but a girl who hasn’t spoken the whole time holds his arm.

“what was was the dead man saying?” The cop finally speaks up again and I think back to that day.

“Чудовище убило нас. Мы не должны были их выпускать. Они обратились к своим хозяевам. The monster killed us. We shouldn’t have let them out. They turned on their masters.” They all look around at each other and seem to understand exactly what the man meant.

“So Monsters? How great does that sound.” No one laughs, tough crowd.

“This is bad, this is really bad.” The cop finally releases me from the handcuffs and I rub at my sore wrist.

“Can anyone care to explain what these Monsters are?” I really hate being left out of things. And hey, I fought a clown, I’m up for anything at this point.

“Demagorgans.” The things from fucking Dungeons and Dragons? What does that stupid game have to do with a massacre in an abandoned building?

“Cool, can I use your phone?” They all jump over to the phone, the silent girl shakes her head no.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me. I need to talk to my friends because a lot of shit has gone down in the last day.” I swear if they don’t let me use the phone I’m going to fucking lose it.

“You can’t, they’re recording conversations. You’ll be putting your friends in danger.” What will the American government find interesting about a kid who can see dead people, and a killer clown?

“My friends and I will be perfectly fine, now let me use the phone.” I hold out my hand, but no one gives me the phone.

“No.” The girl finally speaks, but I’ve had enough of their standing around. I step forward to grab the phone but something pushes me. My back hits the wall with a crack and my injuries flare-up.

“Mother fucker.” I look up and see the girl holding out her hand, blood dripping down her nose. She did this, she hurt me. I look her in the eyes, she clutches her head and drops to the ground screaming.

“What are you doing to her? Stop it!” The cop's heavy footsteps rush towards me and something heavy hits my skull.


	5. Good God, let me give you my life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one gets bloody!

_Eddie kisses me on the cheek after making sure that no one is watching._

“I love you.” He smiles up at me.

“I love you too.” I wave goodbye as he turns around and walks back to his place. I unlock the front door and drop my bag onto my shoes.

“Mom? Dad?” Silence. That’s strange, they told me they’d be home before I got back from school. I shrug to myself and make my way towards the kitchen. There’s a creak from upstairs but I ignore it in favour of making myself a bowl of cereal. Once that’s done I head upstairs to my bedroom. There are drops of something scattered across the hallway floor, but the lighting is too dark to make it out.

“Mom?” I call out but there’s no answer. I flick on the hallway light and slap a hand over my mouth. Blood. There’s blood all over the floor and walls.

“Mom!” I run to the end of the hall where my parents' room is and throw open the door. I puke when I see their mutilated bodies.

“I’m so glad your home.” Patrick steps out front he bathroom covered in blood, a knife in his hand. He advances on me and I try to take a step back but my back hits the wall.

“Don’t run from me, bunny.” He laughs and crouches down in front of me, lifting my head with the blade. He smiles with malicious intent. In my peripherals and can see my mom's lifeless eyes staring up at me, I gag. He tuts and pushes the knife, just barely piercing my skin.

“I’ve been waiting for you, watching you. You’re my perfect fantasy.” The knife digs deeper as I swallow. My hand feels on the ground for anything to use against him, my fingers close around a piece of glass and I swing. It only grazes his cheek but I can see the rage blossoming in his eyes. He rears back on punches me in the nose, my glasses snap. There’s blood gushing from it but he pins my arms to the wall.

“That’s no good. You can’t disobey me like that.” He grabs my shoulders and slams my head against the wall, black spots my vision as my head lolls to the side.

“Better.” He pulls my body away from the wall, so I’m laying in the center of the room, my parents on either side.

“You’re just going to lie still, and take it.” I try to move away but my brain is slush and my arms won’t cooperate. 

“Fuck you.” I spit a glob of blood that lands directly in his eye. He cries out and punches me again.

My shirts still on but my pants are pulled halfway down my legs along with my boxers. I try to get up but my ribs and headache.

“Finally, you’re up. I thought I killed you.” He says with a smile on his face. Tears slip down my cheeks but I wipe them away before he can see.

“I’m going to kill you now. Then I’m going to play with your faggy little boyfriend.” Eddie! The air around me compresses and I know he can feel it too if the confusion on his face is any indicator. I don’t care if he hurt me, I don’t care if he kills me. But by God, I will not let him lay a finger on Eddie. He tries to step towards me but his leg snaps in half, he screams. 

“What the fuck?” He says before his entire skull bursts. His blood splatters across the room completely missing me. I stumble to my feet and make my way downstairs. I have to get to Eddie, I have to make sure he is ok. I stumble down the street, but the ground comes running at me, I don’t have time to put out my hands before I make contact.

It’s dark. I open my eyes but the darkness still surrounds me. There must be a cloth around my eyes because it’s wet with tears.

“Hello?” My hands are tied behind my back and my legs are tied to a chair. I try to move but I’m bound too tightly.

“I’m sorry we had to tie you up, but we can’t trust you after you hurt Eleven.” The boy, Will speaks to me. They don’t take the blindfold off, so I have no way of knowing where I am, or how many people are with me.

“Where am I?” I try to move around again, but no luck. The cop man speaks in his gruff voice.

“I can’t tell you that, kid.” He sounds sad, regretful. I struggle more, even though I know it’s no use. My breathing picks up and I feel the walls closing in on me.

“Please, I can’t see. Please, take it off!” There are footsteps all around me and I desperately turn my head to try and find where they are.

“I’m sorry,” A hand lays on my shoulder, I flinch.

“But we have to keep it on, we don’t know what you can do.” The hand recedes and so does the voice. 

“I didn’t mean to hurt her, please. She hurt me, it was just defensive!” Just like with Patrick, it was self-defence. I didn’t mean to kill him, but I had to protect Eddie.

“I can’t take a risk like that!” The cop shouts and I flinch back from the force of his voice.

“Are you from the lab?” Mike asks.

“Lab? I’m from fucking Derry!” They keep mentioning the lab, and the monsters. They must be connected somehow, and all those dead people. 

“Then how do you talk to dead people, and how did you hurt El with your mind?”

“I don’t fucking know!” Something shatters and someone cries out in shock.

“I believe you.” Will’s voice sounds far away, almost as if he’s afraid to get close to me. Heavy footsteps pass by me and the blindfold falls to my lap. I blink my eyes a few times to get used to the light, everyone watches cautiously. 

“How did you get these powers?” I only knew I could talk to dead people like two days ago, but I killed Patrick before that. But there’s nothing to explain how I would get these. I haven’t been bitten by a spider or jumped into chemicals.

“I don’t know, it just happened one day.” They all look confused, but not as confused as I feel. But I still need to use the damn phone to call someone. Maybe, Mike, he might understand what the hell is going on with me.

“I need the phone, my friend might understand what’s happening.” They’re hesitant.

“Ok but you have to be really vague, otherwise they’ll track you and your friends and take you away.” How the hell am I going to do that? At least Mike is smart, he might be able to pick up on it.


	6. A fresh poison each week

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unfortunately I'm starting school again. :( So my updates will be sporadic and far less, but don't worry I will not forget about you guys and I will try my hardest to get updates out as soon as I can.

There was literally no way to be vague about the situation I was in, but I was not about to put my friends in danger. So, Hopper -as I’ve now come to know the cop- borrowed a Burner phone for me. I dial Mike’s number and hope he picks up. He does, thankfully.  
“Hello Mike-a-million, long time no talk.”  
“Oh, it’s you. Why are you calling fro an unknown number?” It’s so nice to hear his voice, I breathe a sigh of relief.  
“It doesn’t matter, what does matter is that some really weird shit is happening to me. Like talking to dead people and making things explode weird.” There’s a second where he doesn't say anything, and I’m scared he’s going to hang up on me.  
“I was afraid of this.” He was afraid? He knew this was going to happen and he didn’t say anything?  
“Mikey you gotta stop keeping stuff from us.” He sighs on the other end. Does this mean I haven’t been the only one experiencing weird shit? Has Eddie been going through this too?  
“I know and I’m sorry. But I think it might be related to Pennywise. Both you and Bev got caught in the Deadlights, and you were like touched by It.” I shiver at the thought of any part of It living inside me, what if it’s growing?   
“How do I stop it?” Silence, it’s never a good thing.  
“I don’t think you can, Rich. You just have to learn how to control them.” I hang up on him, not satisfied with what he gave me. All I know is that there is a piece of something evil in me, and it could be growing stronger every day. How can I be sure that it won’t take over and kill my friends, kill Eddie? Maybe it is best that I’ve been taken away from them, I can’t hurt them if they aren’t near me. I walk out of the bedroom and back into the living room, where they are waiting for me with expectant faces.  
“So? Do you know what’s going on?” I run a hand through my hair and roughly tug on the strands.  
“No, Mike had nothing.” I lie.

I can’t believe Richie called Mike instead of me. We hadn’t talked in a while and I thought he was just busy adjusting to his new home, but he was going through something terrifying and didn’t even think to call me.  
“What did he say, did he mention me.” Beverly lays a hand on my arm but I brush her off, I don’t want their pity.  
“I don’t know if he wants everyone to know, but I’m pretty sure it has something to do with the deadlights.” Richie never really talked to me about his experience with the deadlights, all I really knew where the screaming nightmares that kept him up for weeks.  
“It’s nothing personal, Eddie. He only called me because he needed information, I’m sure he’ll call you soon.” He better, I miss him.

I can’t call Eddie, I can’t put him in danger. If what Hopper said was true anything I say can be used to hurt us. It’s like I’ve scooped my heart out, but I can’t let that weaken me, I can’t let It control me. What if I lose my temper and kill him, I could never live with myself. I could kill any of them with the blink of an eye, this power is too dangerous. I’m too dangerous.  
“Are you ok?” I’m drawn out of my thoughts by Will’s voice and his hand on my shoulder.  
“Yeah, just a lot on my mind.” Understatement of the year.  
“I can’t imagine how scary it must be, finding out you have these terrifying powers. Last year an alien possessed me and tried to use me to kill all my friends.” I turn to him with a bewildered look on my face. What the actual fuck? Least I haven’t gotten possessed, yet.  
“Yeah, I know. It was insane, but my friends saved me, Mike saved me.” He looks at Mike with an expression I know all too well, adoration.  
“The dead guy, he said something about letting the monsters out. Could this be, by chance the same monster that used you?” He thinks for a second and then turns to Hopper.  
“I think we have a problem.”


	7. I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the well wishes for school! It's been really tough to deal with going back to school in the middle of a pandemic. Everything is different and it's a lot of adjusting. But I love writing and it's a really good distraction from my real life, so I hope to have many more ideas and keep writing these stories into existence.

The one good thing I could think of when leaving Derry was that I’d be leaving my demons (literally and figuratively) behind. But turns out they follow me, all the way to Indiana.

“So you’re telling me that these people were experimenting on children, and then one of those children opened a portal to another dimension, which released Demagorgans. And now you think the Russians tried experimenting on these monsters, but let them out on the world?” They all nod. Good, I don’t have the mental capacity to get it all re-explained to me.

“Well? What are we supposed to do about it?” They seem surprised that I’m so chill with all this, but they don’t know the half of what I’ve been through.

“You believe us? You’re not going to call the cops?” I shake my head no, the cops wouldn’t believe me anyway, they never do.

“Yeah, you guys have no reason to lie to me. Unless you're hazing me if so it’s not funny.” Mike says they’re not, and then it really sets in. I’ve just escaped a hell hole and now it seems I find myself in another. But this can’t be as bad, right? I mean Pennywise could literally turn into your deepest fear, these are just flesh and blood. Flesh and blood can die, fears can’t.

“Eleven closed the hole, that’s how we stopped it. But they must have opened it somehow.” Why do people touch things that they don’t understand?

“If Eleven closed the hole before can’t she just close it again?” The only thing we have to do is find it. It shouldn’t be that hard, it’s a giant throbbing vagina birthing out little hellions.

“No! Last time we almost lost her, I’m not willing to take that chance again.” Well maybe I can close the hole then, I mean I’ve got powers too.

“I can try.” They don’t seem to think that’s a good idea if their protests are anything to go by.

“I don’t think you understand, El is experienced with her powers and she almost died. We have no idea what’ll happen to you” I don’t care what happens to me to be completely honest, I’ve done stuff and I need to atone for it. And if it’s with my life so be it.

“Why don’t we find it and figure it out from there?” That’s how we killed It, so this can’t be any worse.

“Nope! That is where I draw the line, kid. I’m not just going to let you guys go parading around the town looking for monsters. I know how this turns out, I’ve seen it and I’m not going to let you kids get killed.” The sentiment is nice, but we need to kill these things.

“Steve can help!” Dustin -the curly-haired kid- calls out this man's name like I’m supposed to know who he is.

“He helped us last time, I’m sure he’s love to help us again.”

“Are you guys insane? I am not doing this again.” Yeah, that’s what I thought. What sane person would want to go on a monster hunt?

“Please, Steve for me.” This man is not sane, because he crumbles instantly. Maybe it’s like me and big Bill’s relationship, I’d do anything for him.

“So what do I need to do?”


	8. Offer me that deathless death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the delay, I've been busy with school and suffering a bit of a writers block.

This is an awful plan, but I’m not really sure on plans because ours was to ‘kill It’. This at least has a good base.

“Ok, we’re going to get Richie to ask where the portal is, and then we’re going to find a way in there. Once we’re there we need to figure out how to close the portal.” It all sounds good on paper, but I’m not sure how this is going to play out in real life, I mean I’ve never fucking done this before. The others seem confident enough and that’s really all you need, what I learned from the clown is to never show your fear because fear gets you killed. We disperse to our respective homes to get properly dressed and load up on weapons. I don’t show Mike but I took a gun from Hopper’s squad car, though I don’t know how effective they are against Monsters. We meet back at Hopper’s cabin at dusk, the gun safely tucked into the waistband of my jeans, a baggy hoodie overtop to cover it. Once everyone is there Hopper gives us probably the shittiest pep talk ever made.

“Don’t die.” It doesn’t really boost my confidence, and by the looks of it, the others feel the same. We all get in Hopper’s car, the mood sombre. It doesn’t have enough seats so I end up sitting in the trunk with Will.

“Are you scared?” He asks me, I decide to be almost truthful.

“I’ve faced worse.” I don’t think it really helps, but I’m not going to straight-up lie to the kid.

"You have?” I realize I haven’t told them yet, better late than never.

“My own fears. You never know how small you are until you’re facing down your worst fear.” Every time I faced It I was paralyzed in fear, and it used that to Its advantage. But what I know from this monster is that it’s just an ugly sack of skin, so no biggie.

“That’s awful.” I nod and we stay silent until Hopper stops in front of the lab. We get out and I walk at the front of the pack. When I enter the building all of the dead men are standing in front of me, all in different states of decay.

“ _Where is the portal?_ ”

“ _You are a traitor to your country._ ”

“ _Where is the portal!_ ” I scream and they all begin to disperse until there is only one man left. He holds a cherry slurp in one hand.

“ _Underneath the mall._ ” I thank him for his cooperation and he gives me a toothy grin. I turn back to my group and tell them.

“How the hell are we supposed to get there?” Luke asks. I look around at everyone and hope someone comes up with something.

“I saw an elevator!” What are we supposed to do with that? Dustin gives Steve a scolding look.

‘I saw an elevator going down.” Steve clarifies and I finally understand. But this all seems too easy, we take an elevator and push a button and all of this is over? It’s never that easy. We load ourselves back into the car and drive to the mall. When we get there it’s bustling with people and my nerves pick up. This is it, it’s do or die (hopefully Do). Steve leads us to the elevator he saw and we stop in front of it.

“This is it. Is everyone sure they want to do this.” We’re the only ones who can do this, no one else would be willing. Instead of answering we stay silent, which is answer enough. Steve pushes the button and the steel doors lift.

There’s dried blood coating the floor, and it crackles as we walk, I surprise the urge to gag.

“This is awful.” The others aren’t fairing as well, that'll probably have a lasting effect on their mental well being. Even a few years after the clown It still haunts my dreams. We finally find the source of all the blood, bodies are strewn everywhere a variety of fatal wounds present on their skin. Someone behind me gags, I don’t blame them the sight is fucking awful. We walk past more bodies and more blood until we reach a doorway. Something is inscribed on the plaque.

“What’s it say?” I shrug.

“But it’s Russian, you speak Russian.” I turn around and look at Mike.

“Yeah, _speak_. My mom never taught me how to read it.” He rolls his eyes but I decide to ignore that. I turn the handle and it clicks open revealing a set of stairs.

“After you.” Someone calls and I sigh. I start walking into the darkness. As we get deeper down a distant humming gets louder and louder. There’s an orange light at the bottom, airily reminiscent of the Deadlights.

“ _Come home._ ” I look around at the group as we finally get to the bottom.

“Did you guys hear that?’ They look at me, confused.

“Hear what.” I don’t get to answer because all of a sudden my consciousness is being swept away.

"What the fuck?” I look around at the ashes of a town, burnt bodies are everywhere.

“ _It’s time to come home, Richard._ ” I look around at the burning embers, the town sign catches my eye. Welcome to Derry. I’m standing on a pile of bodies, my friends among them.

“Bill?” His lifeless eyes stare up at me, just as my parents did. His mouth doesn’t move but his voice speaks to me.

“You did this.” The rest of my friends' voices chime in, taunting me. I look down and see Eddie kneeling in front of me.

"Please don’t do this, Richie. Please, I’ll be good, I promise.” There’s a gun to his head, and I’m the one holding it.

“Eddie? I don’t want to, I don’t want to hurt you.” My finger pulls the trigger and his head flies back. I scream in agony.

“Eddie!” His body falls amongst the others and he joins in their chanting.

“It’s your fault.” I fall to my knees and drop the body gun to the ground, I cradle Eddie’s body.

“I'm sorry, I’m sorry,” I repeat until my mind collapses.


	9. Young Lovers with their legs tied up in knots

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you may be alarmed at seeing that this is the last chapter, but fear not it's only the end of the beginning. I'm going to make this into a series so there's no need to worry about this being the end.

“You guys see him spazzing, right? I can’t be the only one seeing this.” At first, the voices are muffled and unidentifiable but they slowly become clearer.

“Is he dead?” There’s an exasperated sigh coming from my left.

“No he’s too dead, you can clearly see he’s breathing.” Someone touches my chest and my eyes finally open, Mike jumps back about a foot.

“What the fuck happened?” There’s a pounding in my head and vivid images are flashing across my arm, I bite back a whimper at the scene. 

“Your eyes went all white and you started seizing, or something.” Milky white, just as Bev’s eyes had been when she was trapped in the deadlights. This portal and the monsters and bodies must all be related back to It. I heard Its voice calling me, telling me to come home.

“How do we turn this off?” Hopper looks hesitant about me getting up so soon after, but I need to wash my hands of this once and for all. A young scientist with a massive crater in his skull speaks up.

“ _You have to turn the keys_.” I look at the control panel and see only one key, where the fuck is the other one?

“ _There’s only one, idiot._ ” It’s probably not a good idea to antagonize the dead.

“ _The other key is inside._ ” He points a mutilated to the pulsing portal on the other side of the glass. It’s genius, to put the other key inside. The only way to close it is to go inside, effectively trapping you there. No one in their right mind would willingly sacrifice themselves.

“I have to go in.” All their heads swivel to me in shock, Will shakes his head no.

“Do you even know what you're going into? We have to find another way.” This is the only way, and I have to be the one to do it. I’ve looked into the Deadlight’s, I’m the only one who’s seen the full exposure of It. And If I don’t close this, there’s no telling what will happen to my friends back home, to Eddie. It could come back any minute, and I can’t put Eddie in danger like that.

“Turn the key and it’ll seal off the gateway. I’ll find the key inside and shut it down.” They all look at me like I’m crazy, maybe I am.

‘There’s another way, we just need time to find it.” I shake my head no and start walking towards the portal, Mike puts a hand non my arm.

“There’s no time, this is the only way.” I shake his arm off and run so no one can stop me. There’s an anguished scream as the world around me blurs.

I’m probably wearing holes in Mike’s carpet form the amount of pacing I’m doing. It’s been days since Mike got that call from Richie, and none of us had heard anything since.

“What did he sound like, on the phone? Was he worried? Was he scared?’ He was asking about the Deadlight’s so something must have happened.

“He sounded stressed, but ultimately normal.” Mike shrugs and I almost hit him for his calm, how can he just sit there while his friend might be in great danger.

“We have to go there.” Stan pulls me down on the couch and I give him what I hope is a nasty look.

“Do you even know his address? Do you know his Aunt's name?” I shake my head no, Richie never talked about them. I know he’s right, but I can’t help but feel mad at him for crushing any little hope I had left.

“He’s going to be fine, he always is.” I scrub my hand over my face and stamp my feet on the ground like a child, Beverly doesn’t look amused.

“Remember that time he was missing for three days?” Those were literally the worst three days of my life, we had all thought he was clown chow.

“He broke his glasses and couldn’t find his way home, he was literally twenty minutes away.” This isn’t helping me believe the fact that he’s going to be fine. He couldn't find his own house for Godsake! 

“Stan, this isn’t helping.” He sighs.

“What I’m trying to say, is that he found his way home on the end and he was perfectly fine.” My mind can’t help but turn to the situation where he wasn’t ok. Maybe we wouldn’t have found his body until weeks later, decomposed and squirming with maggots in a grimy ditch.

“This is different, he’s not twenty minutes from home anymore.” Stan tries to put a comforting hand on my shoulder but I shrug him off. He’s only called me once the entire time he’s been gone, that’s not like him at all. When he and his family went to Portland for a week he called me every single day.

“There’s something wrong, I can feel it.” A knock at the door draws me out of my frantic worrying, I jump up and run to the door to answer it.

“Hello?” My jaw drops to the floor when I see Richie standing right in front of me. He pushes the door open with his foot and wraps me in a huge, his breath tickling my ear.

“I’m _home_ now.”


End file.
